Senior Week Anyone?

Hi Peeps! How is your summer going? Ours is going great so far. It's been kind of busy - summer is becoming one of my busy seasons. Everyone tries to get their teachers trained over the summer now instead of at the beginning of the school year. So I've been pretty busy - but busy is good. The kids have eased into their summer routines like the little laid back chameleons they are. You'd think they were born in the water. They've turned a delicious shade of brown that I can never hope to duplicate on this pale body and Bella seems to grow a bit taller every night as she sleeps. She is just about as tall as I am - quite sobering, no? Jack just finished his baseball season, complete with an appearance in the All Star Game AND an invitation to play travel next year. YIKES! I'm not sure that the Busy Momma crew is ready for that level of chaos yet...I think the transition to Middle School will be chaotic enough for the fall. It's under review...

As many of you know - PC turned 40 last weekend! Wa-Hooo! And in thinking about how to celebrate such a momentus event - I, of course, suggested a big, blow-out party. An event that if you know anything about my darling PC, is exactly what he DID NOT want. My PC is NOT a party guy. He's more of a fly-under-the-radar and relax kind of a guy. Parties are really not his thing. So he decided that a nice, quiet, relaxing trip to the beach would be the perfect fortieth birthday gift. So - that's exactly what we did...well - sort of.

We went to the beach, and we had a GREAT time. And we relaxed. It was the "quiet" part of the equation that I don't think we got quite right. You see PC's birthday happens to coincide with a Maryland tradition known as "Senior Week". It really should be called "Senior WeekS" because Senior Week spans a few weeks in June. During Senior Week - recently graduated High School Seniors flock to the beach in droves and engage in all sorts of irresponsible, reprehensible, horrifying behaviors - including but not limited to: having sex with random strangers, drinking to the point of alchohol poisoning, jumping from hotel balconies into pools, swimming in the ocean at night while intoxicated, getting into fights on the boardwalk, playing chicken and running into oncoming traffic on Ocean Highway and all sorts of other craziness that ALWAYS leads to at least one kid being killed during what should be the happiest time thus far in his or her life.

Now, I realize that not ALL kids who attend senior week engage in these behaviors. I know that many kids go down to the beach, lay in the sun, have a few beers and make memories that last a lifetime - PC being one of them. But the stories of the debauchery, the injuries, the deaths are enough to make any parent just cringe at the thought of allowing her precious baby to go down there! But I digress..

We stayed at a really nice hotel - a place I picked because I was pretty sure that the Senior Week crowd wouldn't be able to afford the nightly rate. I was wrong.  We got there late on Friday night, and I realized we were in trouble right away. There was a giant group of kids sitting around on the patio outside of the tiki bar, decked out in their Hollister hoodies, drinking Bud Lights out of the bottle being really, really loud. For no good reason - other than to be really, really loud. Oiy. Thankfully, our room was at the other end of the resort - so they didn't bother us.

However - at about 3am - the rest of the revelers came home to roost. High as kites, drunk as skunks and LOUD as ..well ...really loud things. One gentleman decided that he needed to scream every word he said. It was lovely. Picture the goodnight scene in the Waltons: "Goodnight Mary Ellen, Goodnight John Boy.." only SCREAMED in a slurred drunken tone: "Night Skeets Man...Night Ball Sak...Night Tea Bag.."

Charming.

The next night we were all startled by the sound of a young woman SCREAMING her gd head off and running down the road. She really sounded like she was in trouble - so of course - it was PC to the rescue as I tried to make up little reasons why the girl might be screaming to soothe the children:
Me: "Oh you know, maybe she is being stung by a jellyfish."
Bella: "In the middle of the night?"
Jack: "Cool - then Dad could pee on her. That would be so cool."
Bella: "Why would she be running down the street if she was being stung by a jellyfish - in the middle of the night? No Mom, I think someone is attacking her."
Jack: "It would be way cooler if she was being attacked by a school of jellyfish and Dad and a whole bunch of people had to pee on her all at once. Maybe I should go too. I have to pee now."
Me: "Jack - pee in the bathroom - Bella, I'm sure no one is attacking her. Just relax."
Bella: "Well the jellyfish theory makes no sense. I think we should call 911"
Jack: "Yeah mom - that way the police men could all pee on her too. That's good thinking Bella."
Bella: in a rage now"OH MY GOD JACK - SHE IS NOT BEING ATTACKED BY A JELLY FISH YOU ARE SUCH A RETARD! SHE IS BEING ATTACKED BY A MAN AND MOM IS JUST MAKING THAT LAME STORY UP SO THAT WE WON'T BE SCARED! JUST SHUT UP ALREADY ABOUT THE PEE!"

And then, predicatbly all hell breaks loose.

A little while later, PC walks back into the room carrying a bottle of water and Diet Pepsi - oblivious to the civil unrest that has just erupted in room 201. No one was attacking the girl - man or beast. Apparently, the girl was TRIPPING - and having a BAD one. So, when PC realized that he could be of no assistance - to rescue her or to pee on her - he walked to the Wawa and picked up some drinks for the next day.

So, all in all - we had a great birthday weekend. But seeing the Seniors in action - these newly minted adults - just cemented my conviction that my children will NEVER attend senior week while I am alive. So thank you very much Ball Sak guy - thank you very much Attacked -by -a -Jelly- Fish -in -the- Middle -of -the- Night -Girl - you have just undoubtedly "ruined" Jack and Bella's lives for them. Way to go!