So - a wise woman once said that we're all a little bit crazy. (I might have totally just made that up - don't know.) Some of us, like Busy Momma, take that crazy to a whole new level. And by 'crazy", I don't mean real mental illness. I mean everyday quirkiness that makes us who we are. I was reminded of my unique brand of "crazy" the other day as I was talking with one of my girls.
This particular gal happens to work for a minor celebrity. Actually, less of a celebrity really and more like someone who might CATER to celebrities. Let's just put it this way - if I mentioned this person's name - many of my female readers would recognize the name.The 2 men who read this blog would have no clue - that's all I'm saying'. That's all you're getting from me.
So anyway - as we were speaking about my pal's day at work, I might have casually mentioned that what her boss really needs is to have ME in HER life. Because, in MY deluded world, I truly believe that all this person needs is Busy Momma's brand of wisdom. And by "what this person really needs", I really mean what I need is to have this particular person in MY life. I'd really like to have her ear. And not because I think she's an awesome, amazing, inspirational business woman who I could learn ALOT from. Nope - not really. I think I need to have her in MY life because I am, if nothing else, at my core, a celebrity crazed, pop-culture whore who could milk this relationship for ALL it's worth. There it is peeps - in black and white. I want this gal's ear because I truly believe that she could make ALL of my celebrity dreams come true. Here is how it would work:
Let's say that this particular person and I were to randomly meet in a very carefully crafted and manipulated situation - like perhaps I "drop-in" to her offices in NYC to take my girlfriend out to lunch. (Never mind that her office and my New York office are AT LEAST 2 subway rides across town from one another and I would have no time to leave my Midtown office to just casually "stroll" down and across town to randomly "meet up" with my pal - but her boss doesn't know this...) And as I walk in, at a time when I KNOW full well that this woman will be in the office, I am uber- uber cool. I mean, Angelina Jolie level cool.
(Caveat to this plan - my friend will NEVER allow this meeting to take place because she thinks that either :
1. I will go all ape-shit upon meeting this woman and totally embarrass her leading her to have to call the cops and tell them that I am a stalker and that she doesn't know who the hell I am and to arrest me right away.
or
2. I will SO over-act the whole "Angelina cool business" that the gig will be up even before it starts.
Oh yea of little faith.....)
I will say something like: "Oh, hello. You must be _____. I'm One Busy Momma - yes, the One Busy Momma. Oh - thanks - yes I do hear that the blog is sometimes funny and witty. Oh - now you're embarrassing me. You're a sweet heart. I'm here to steal your _________ away for a quick bite of lunch. I don't suppose you'd like to join us?"
And here's the crazy- she agrees. And over a lunch consisting of a Nicoise salad - a parasitic friendship is born. And I become the Kato Kalin of her life.
Now - that's crazy and deluded enough - but here is where the real crazy begins. Because I can see this one meeting leading in all KINDS of wonderfully different directions for me. Let's say that this person could introduce me to someone TRULY powerful in my celebrity world - like Kris Kardashian Jenner! BOOM - Keeping Up with One Busy Momma and Crew ! BOOM - Busy Momma and Crew take Paris! (OK - maybe not Paris - but maybe "Busy Momma and Crew take Target"!)
Soon, I am a household name. And what does EVERY household name need? A stylist! BOOM - Rachel Zoe enters my life and it is BANANAS I tell you! Rachel and I get close - I mean REALLY, REALLY close. I give her parenting advice and she gives me tips and tricks that allow me to loose those last 60 pregnancy pounds in a month. This probably involves a small detour down "heroin highway" - but hey - I'm skinny in 30 days. Then after an embarrasing incident on a red carpet somewhere, Kris decides that for Februaray sweeps - we need an INTERVENTION episode and BOOM - Dr. Phil enters my life. The scene is set - I am invited to Kris' house for a "Tupperware" party - but when I get there - the gig is up. Rachel, Kris, Bruce, Kim, Khloe, Kourtney - and Scott - all intervene with me and convince me to go to rehab...and I say no, no, no...until I learn that rehab is in MALIBU on the beach! Holla!I quickly change my mind and BOOM! I spend 45 days at Promises in Malibu, and who do I befriend? LINDASY LOHAN baby! And what happens next is not to be believed!
I am featured on the COVER of PEOPLE magazine as the lady who FINALLY helped Lindsay clean up her act. I become a mother figure for Lindsay and the next thing you know - she is accepting an Academy Award for her gritty and raw performance as "Terri" - the girl who would become Mother Theresa. And in her speech she thanks ME for making it all possible and getting her off of the SMACK. She demands that I stand up and join her on stage - I am her date to the awards of course. And despite my best efforts and 10 pounds of Spanks, all of the excess skin around my middle is still visible under my Carolina Herrara gown - 'cause that's how I roll these days. And WHO happens to be watching the awards shows but - ADRIENNE MALOOF (my FAVORITE Beverly Hills housewife). She intervenes with her husband Paul - plastic surgeon to the stars and BOOM! Tummy tuck, boob job, nose job, thigh sculpting and butt lift!
The next thing you know, my favorite network - Bravo TV - approaches me about expanding my growing media empire. My televised plastic surgery did SO well on the ratings charts, that they would like to expand their Real Housewives franchise and feature me and the girls in "The Real Housewives of Bel Air, MD". How could we say no? And them BOOM - Sookie, Her Awesomeness, Glyniss, Xena, Carrie and myself are receiving NOBEL Peace Prizes for bringing the "reality" back to reality tv. (I think it is the episode where I sit Scott Disick down and explain to him that the only thing worse than being famous for nothing is being famous because you impregnanted someone who is famous for nothing that truly clinches the award for us.In the gut-wrenching double episode, I convince Scott that he needs to do MORE with his life than buy Bentleys, Grand pianos and wear smoking jackets all day long. And he agrees, goes to medical school and finds a cure for hormonal neck acne. It's amazing tv.)
I could go on all day here peeps. I haven't even BEGUN to explain how I become the DARLING of the gay fashion community by appearing on "It's a Brad, Brad World" OR how I save Dancing with the Stars by agreeing to go on and dance my way to the mirror ball trophy with my darling Louis Van Amstell. Our Passe Doble brings tears to Len Goodman's eyes - that's all I'm saying.
Crazy talk? Perhaps....but in a world where Scott Disick IS a celebrity, where Kim Kardashian believes that going to HAITI and watching a fashion show there will somehow save her tarnished public image and a man named Newt thinks he can become the next President of the United States - how crazy AM I really??????????????
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
An Open Letter to the Gal who Bagged My Groceries....
An Open Letter to the Bag Girl at Shop Rite:
In Defense of Your Mom
Darling:
While I realize that bagging groceries is a difficult task, and I thank you for not crushing one item in my order last week, we need to talk about your attitude. You see, I did not mind when you asked if “Me and HER can switch out so I can bag and she can ring”. I truly didn’t. As much as I itched to correct your grammatical mistake – I refrained. I waited patiently as you switched positions, counted your coupons and entered your codes into the scanner. And while I didn’t mean to eavesdrop on what I ASSUME WAS MEANT TO BE A PRIVATE CONVERSATION BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU, I couldn’t help but overhear your comments about your mother.
While you were bagging my vegetables, milk and frozen waffles, your counterpart asked you a question about your phone. Remember? She asked you why your phone was off. Ahhh – yes, it’s all coming back to you now, isn’t it? You told her that your mom turned your phone off. And when she asked you WHY your mom would do such a thing, do you remember your response? I do. Your exact words were:
“ I have no idea. I didn’t even do nothin’ wrong.”
And your girlfriend said: “Then why would she turn off your phone?”
And your eloquent, well-thought out response was poetic in its simplicity:
“’Cause she’s psycho!”
Ahhh – the old psycho mom excuse.
Well, sweet, sweet girl, I am writing to you to explain why, in fact, your mom is probably NOT psycho. She’s probably a pretty good mom. How, pray-tell would I know that- You ask. Well, you see 2 reasons.
1. I AM a mom.
2. I WAS a pain-in-the-ass teenager – and I know your game.
Let’s start with the fact that I was a pretty huge pain-in-the –ass between the ages if 14-18. And sweetheart – let’s be real…you know EXACTLY what you did. You might not know how your mom CAUGHT you, since, with your obvious brain power, your plan must have seemed absolutely FOOL-PROOF to you. But, apparently it wasn’t Mom-Proof. And there is no shame in that. You see – what you don’t yet realize is that we – and by “we”, I mean moms in general – are smarter, wittier, more clever, wiser and savvier than you could ever be right now. You might know more about the cast of The Jersey Shore and what’s happening on The Bachelor – but honey, I will bet you dollars to doughnuts that your mom knows everything there is to know about how that little pea-brain in your head is working. And it probably scares the crap out of her. Does she get her hair colored? Have you noticed new lines and creases around her eyes and along her forehead? That’s all because of you, lady. Those are worry lines and just THINKING about what YOU are THINKING about and plotting has scared the beautiful natural color RIGHT OUT OF HER HAIR. So you can just stop pretending that you have no idea why she turned your phone off. The gig is up.
Now – let’s talk for a moment about Moms – and what we know and all that good stuff. I’m pretty sure that your mom is in fact, NOT psychotic. Let me ask you a few questions to help you determine if, indeed, she might suffer from psychosis:
• Has she ever forgotten to feed you?
• Has she ever left you somewhere for days on end and not come back to get you?
• Has she ever disappeared for days and days and days?
• Has she ever forgotten your birthday?
• Has she ever beaten you to a bloody pulp?
• Has she ever tried to intentionally hurt or harm you in any way?
• Has she ever tried to sell you on Craig’s list?
If you can answer NO to all of these questions – then chances are, she’s NOT a psycho. She just has your number. She knows that you and your friends live, breathe and die by that phone. That phone is your life-line, your social currency, your social oxygen mask, if you will. It’s probably the ONLY thing that you really value and care about right now. That type of possession – is what we moms LOVE to take away. NOT because we are psycho – but because taking it away is the ONLY WAY TO GET THROUGH TO YOUR IDIOT TEENAGE BRAIN.
And it’s not all your fault. Biology does come into play here. While you are obviously no Shakespeare or Emily Dickinson, I will admit that your teenage brain is not fully developed. So some of your obvious stupidity can be attributed to your age. SOME of it….
Your mom shut your phone off to teach you some sort of lesson. So, instead of “staring at it and wishing that it will just turn back on by itself” why don’t you reflect on what you think you might have done to cause mom to turn it off in the first place.
(Oh – and phones don’t just “magically turn themselves back on”. Sorry – hate TO BURST YOUR BUBBLE. )
And here is the last reason why I just KNOW that your mom is not psycho – she is willing to listen to you bitch and moan about this phone being turned off to help you learn a life lesson. If she was really a psycho – she would just leave that phone on and let you yak yourself into a Snookie-like state. But, she obviously has more faith in you. She thinks that you might be able to rise above your obvious aspirations to get onto a reality show about teenage grocery baggers with bad grammar. So, hey – try something new while the phone is silenced. Try to crack open a book….one without pictures…just try it – ok?
In Defense of Your Mom
Darling:
While I realize that bagging groceries is a difficult task, and I thank you for not crushing one item in my order last week, we need to talk about your attitude. You see, I did not mind when you asked if “Me and HER can switch out so I can bag and she can ring”. I truly didn’t. As much as I itched to correct your grammatical mistake – I refrained. I waited patiently as you switched positions, counted your coupons and entered your codes into the scanner. And while I didn’t mean to eavesdrop on what I ASSUME WAS MEANT TO BE A PRIVATE CONVERSATION BETWEEN THE TWO OF YOU, I couldn’t help but overhear your comments about your mother.
While you were bagging my vegetables, milk and frozen waffles, your counterpart asked you a question about your phone. Remember? She asked you why your phone was off. Ahhh – yes, it’s all coming back to you now, isn’t it? You told her that your mom turned your phone off. And when she asked you WHY your mom would do such a thing, do you remember your response? I do. Your exact words were:
“ I have no idea. I didn’t even do nothin’ wrong.”
And your girlfriend said: “Then why would she turn off your phone?”
And your eloquent, well-thought out response was poetic in its simplicity:
“’Cause she’s psycho!”
Ahhh – the old psycho mom excuse.
Well, sweet, sweet girl, I am writing to you to explain why, in fact, your mom is probably NOT psycho. She’s probably a pretty good mom. How, pray-tell would I know that- You ask. Well, you see 2 reasons.
1. I AM a mom.
2. I WAS a pain-in-the-ass teenager – and I know your game.
Let’s start with the fact that I was a pretty huge pain-in-the –ass between the ages if 14-18. And sweetheart – let’s be real…you know EXACTLY what you did. You might not know how your mom CAUGHT you, since, with your obvious brain power, your plan must have seemed absolutely FOOL-PROOF to you. But, apparently it wasn’t Mom-Proof. And there is no shame in that. You see – what you don’t yet realize is that we – and by “we”, I mean moms in general – are smarter, wittier, more clever, wiser and savvier than you could ever be right now. You might know more about the cast of The Jersey Shore and what’s happening on The Bachelor – but honey, I will bet you dollars to doughnuts that your mom knows everything there is to know about how that little pea-brain in your head is working. And it probably scares the crap out of her. Does she get her hair colored? Have you noticed new lines and creases around her eyes and along her forehead? That’s all because of you, lady. Those are worry lines and just THINKING about what YOU are THINKING about and plotting has scared the beautiful natural color RIGHT OUT OF HER HAIR. So you can just stop pretending that you have no idea why she turned your phone off. The gig is up.
Now – let’s talk for a moment about Moms – and what we know and all that good stuff. I’m pretty sure that your mom is in fact, NOT psychotic. Let me ask you a few questions to help you determine if, indeed, she might suffer from psychosis:
• Has she ever forgotten to feed you?
• Has she ever left you somewhere for days on end and not come back to get you?
• Has she ever disappeared for days and days and days?
• Has she ever forgotten your birthday?
• Has she ever beaten you to a bloody pulp?
• Has she ever tried to intentionally hurt or harm you in any way?
• Has she ever tried to sell you on Craig’s list?
If you can answer NO to all of these questions – then chances are, she’s NOT a psycho. She just has your number. She knows that you and your friends live, breathe and die by that phone. That phone is your life-line, your social currency, your social oxygen mask, if you will. It’s probably the ONLY thing that you really value and care about right now. That type of possession – is what we moms LOVE to take away. NOT because we are psycho – but because taking it away is the ONLY WAY TO GET THROUGH TO YOUR IDIOT TEENAGE BRAIN.
And it’s not all your fault. Biology does come into play here. While you are obviously no Shakespeare or Emily Dickinson, I will admit that your teenage brain is not fully developed. So some of your obvious stupidity can be attributed to your age. SOME of it….
Your mom shut your phone off to teach you some sort of lesson. So, instead of “staring at it and wishing that it will just turn back on by itself” why don’t you reflect on what you think you might have done to cause mom to turn it off in the first place.
(Oh – and phones don’t just “magically turn themselves back on”. Sorry – hate TO BURST YOUR BUBBLE. )
And here is the last reason why I just KNOW that your mom is not psycho – she is willing to listen to you bitch and moan about this phone being turned off to help you learn a life lesson. If she was really a psycho – she would just leave that phone on and let you yak yourself into a Snookie-like state. But, she obviously has more faith in you. She thinks that you might be able to rise above your obvious aspirations to get onto a reality show about teenage grocery baggers with bad grammar. So, hey – try something new while the phone is silenced. Try to crack open a book….one without pictures…just try it – ok?
Saturday, January 14, 2012
And They Call it Puppy Love...
Come on...I bet you can hear Donny Osmond singing in your brain right now. Singing about that exhilarating, amazing experience of being a teenager and being completely infatuated with someone - commonly known as "puppy love".
And they called it puppy love
Oh, I guess they'll never know
How a young heart really feels
And why I love her so
Who can't relate to that? We've all experienced that dizzing feeling of being - or thinking that we are - completely in LOVE with someone. I remember feeling it in 8th grade after I saw "Top Gun". Tom Cruise was the man of my dreams. He was all I could think about. I dreamed about him, I daydreamed about him, I practiced writing my name as "Mary Cruise", "Mrs. Cruise", "Mrs. Tom Cruise" and on and on. I was obsessed. And my friends, I am now admitting that I am experiencing this feeling once again. Which is disturbing as I am 364 days away from turning 40 - and me thinks that I'm a wee-bit too old for "puppy love". But MY brand of puppy love is a bit different - it is ACTUAL PUPPY love.
Yes my friends, I have fallen in love with my new puppy - Jake. Just look at him! How can anyone NOT fall in love with this little man? Jake entered our lives about 6 weeks ago, and oh my goodness - bringing him home was the best thing we've ever done. He is just the most loving, affectionate, adorable pup I have ever seen. This adorableness has really worked in his favor, because let's just say that the past 6 weeks have brought a few of Jake's "issues" into focus.
As much as we love him - he does have a few habits that we are working to break. Issue number one is truly serious and heartbreaking. This issue would be a total deal-breaker if Jake wasn't so cute. I am sorry to announce that my Jake has an addiction. Jake is addicted to chewing shoes. And not just any old shoes from Payless - oh no. Jake is addicted to chewing EXPENSIVE shoes. The MORE expensive the shoe, the more delicious it seems to be! Jake prefers a nice, medium-rare UGG slipper to say a well-done Isotoner slipper. A nice Ugg loafer appears to be quite lovely as an appetizer and nothing says dessert to my boy like a nice UGG boot. For a special treat, Jake seems to enjoy a nice basic black leather pump. Especially those pumps that contain Nike Air technology to make standing on 4-inch heels comfortable all day. That technology doesn't come cheap, my friends.
Doesn't that look DELICIOUS??????????? To be honest - this is killing me. You all know how much I LOVE me my shoes. I take meticulous care of them - they live in labeled, organized clear plastic bins in my closet. When I travel, they are lovingly put into shoe bags and while I realize that this is a bit OCD - I can't help myself. I love shoes. I love shopping for shoes, I love how wearing killer shoes makes me feel, I even love just LOOKING at awesome shoes. This is why this little addiction of Jake's has got to be broken. I am currently looking for a 12-step puppy program.
Issue number two is kind of gross. Ok - it's really, really gross. See, my little man, while very, very smart seems to be having a problem understanding that we don't do our business on the carpets. Somehow he's gotten the idea that it's ok to go outside, do number one and then come back inside and take a dump on the carpet. And no matter what we do - he is still having accidents! Now everyone tells me that this is normal - but it's still tres disgusting. All I can say is that we are truly getting every penny out of that carpet steam cleaner we bought last year! We are doing everything the Dog Whisperer and other dog experts suggest. We are taking him outside after every accident - Bella is actually outside with him right now. (Yep - he took a whiz while I was typing this.) PC has announced that Jake is not allowed on ANY carpeted surface until he has been trained. So - he is currently out at Home Dept buying 4 baby/pet gates. So, by the time you read this, my house will look like an asylum or a rat's maze with gates and barriers erected at every turn. Right now, PC has erected what I am lovingly referring to as "ghetto gates". He has a 6 foot folding table stretched out across the doorway to the dining room, a broken but usable baby gate at the living room doorway and all sorts of booby-traps on the stairway leading to the second floor. So the gates will actually be a welcomed improvement to the ghetto containment system we've currently got going.
And lastly, the other unfortunate issue we are dealing with is nipping and biting. It seems that pup-pups thinks that nipping and biting our hands and feet is a super-fun way to pass some time. And while I realize that this is how he would play with his canine siblings, his human siblings don't find this fun or endearing. ESPECIALLY when he jumps up and bites their noses! (Horrifying - I know) SO - this is the FIRST behavior that must stop IMMEDIATELY. We are using the crate when he gets out-of-control to help him calm down. But it's SO SAD when he cries. But I am standing firm and not letting him out when he cries. The Dog Whisperer says to let him out when he's calm and quiet - and that's what we are doing.
And they called it puppy love
Oh, I guess they'll never know
How a young heart really feels
And why I love her so
Who can't relate to that? We've all experienced that dizzing feeling of being - or thinking that we are - completely in LOVE with someone. I remember feeling it in 8th grade after I saw "Top Gun". Tom Cruise was the man of my dreams. He was all I could think about. I dreamed about him, I daydreamed about him, I practiced writing my name as "Mary Cruise", "Mrs. Cruise", "Mrs. Tom Cruise" and on and on. I was obsessed. And my friends, I am now admitting that I am experiencing this feeling once again. Which is disturbing as I am 364 days away from turning 40 - and me thinks that I'm a wee-bit too old for "puppy love". But MY brand of puppy love is a bit different - it is ACTUAL PUPPY love.
As much as we love him - he does have a few habits that we are working to break. Issue number one is truly serious and heartbreaking. This issue would be a total deal-breaker if Jake wasn't so cute. I am sorry to announce that my Jake has an addiction. Jake is addicted to chewing shoes. And not just any old shoes from Payless - oh no. Jake is addicted to chewing EXPENSIVE shoes. The MORE expensive the shoe, the more delicious it seems to be! Jake prefers a nice, medium-rare UGG slipper to say a well-done Isotoner slipper. A nice Ugg loafer appears to be quite lovely as an appetizer and nothing says dessert to my boy like a nice UGG boot. For a special treat, Jake seems to enjoy a nice basic black leather pump. Especially those pumps that contain Nike Air technology to make standing on 4-inch heels comfortable all day. That technology doesn't come cheap, my friends.
Issue number two is kind of gross. Ok - it's really, really gross. See, my little man, while very, very smart seems to be having a problem understanding that we don't do our business on the carpets. Somehow he's gotten the idea that it's ok to go outside, do number one and then come back inside and take a dump on the carpet. And no matter what we do - he is still having accidents! Now everyone tells me that this is normal - but it's still tres disgusting. All I can say is that we are truly getting every penny out of that carpet steam cleaner we bought last year! We are doing everything the Dog Whisperer and other dog experts suggest. We are taking him outside after every accident - Bella is actually outside with him right now. (Yep - he took a whiz while I was typing this.) PC has announced that Jake is not allowed on ANY carpeted surface until he has been trained. So - he is currently out at Home Dept buying 4 baby/pet gates. So, by the time you read this, my house will look like an asylum or a rat's maze with gates and barriers erected at every turn. Right now, PC has erected what I am lovingly referring to as "ghetto gates". He has a 6 foot folding table stretched out across the doorway to the dining room, a broken but usable baby gate at the living room doorway and all sorts of booby-traps on the stairway leading to the second floor. So the gates will actually be a welcomed improvement to the ghetto containment system we've currently got going.
And lastly, the other unfortunate issue we are dealing with is nipping and biting. It seems that pup-pups thinks that nipping and biting our hands and feet is a super-fun way to pass some time. And while I realize that this is how he would play with his canine siblings, his human siblings don't find this fun or endearing. ESPECIALLY when he jumps up and bites their noses! (Horrifying - I know) SO - this is the FIRST behavior that must stop IMMEDIATELY. We are using the crate when he gets out-of-control to help him calm down. But it's SO SAD when he cries. But I am standing firm and not letting him out when he cries. The Dog Whisperer says to let him out when he's calm and quiet - and that's what we are doing.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
The Dinner Dance
But I digress - the topic of this blog isn't Jake: The Wonder Dog. That will be a post when he is COMPLETELY housetrained! No - today's blog is about a topic that we ALL have in common - the daily dinner dance. Am I the ONLY mommy who is just sick and tired of making the SAME things for dinner week after week? I can't be! I cannot put another pot roast into the slow cooker again without wanting to slit my wrists. And I think my family agrees. We have fallen into a dinner rut over here and we need to break out of it and explore other recipes! But here is our issue - I have a very picky eater at my table. Jack is an eating champ. He has tried sushi, he loves salad, he eats calamari, shrimp, chicken, EGGPLANT - pretty much whatever you put on his plate. Bella on the other hand is a bit pickier. And that makes menu planning really hard. I cook what I know Bella will eat. And that consists of stir-fry, plain chicken, rice, plain pasta, pizza, pork chops,burgers, pot roast, and anything that covered in barbecue sauce.
Now in her defense - she has gotten a bit more adventurous. Tonight she ate eggplant and beef ragu over sauteed polenta. (The recipe is in this month's Weight Watcher's magazine)Now I know that sounds exotic - but it's basically meat sauce with eggplant over polenta - that she didn't really like. But she really is trying. And I am so proud of her for that. But she definitlty knows what she likes and doesn't like. When she was little, I used to make all of those yummy "sneaky chef" recipes for her. The ones that involved steaming and purreing veggies and "hiding" them in food. The recipes are SO good - but now that I work full time - I really don't have the time to do that. AND I really don't think that "hiding" veggies is a good tactic for tweenagers. They have to make good choices for themselves.
So - what is a Bust Momma to do? I am REALLY hoping that you guys can help me. I am in desperate need of some recipes that are healthy and picky-eater friendly. I really like to cook at least 5 night a week and I try to make healthy meals. So - Here is my "dinner dance card" - the meals that rotate in and out of our weekly rotation - and while they are all super yummy - we are kind of sick of them!. If you want any of the recipes - just comment on the blog or on FB and I'll be happy to share. All of these meals take 30 minutes or less to prepare - unless they are slow cooker recipes. Ready?
- Pot Roast and veggies (slow cooker)
- Home-made Chicken Soup (Ina Garten's recipe - so easy - it cooks itself)
- Turkey Cutlet Marsala
- Chicken Parm (This takes a bit longer than 30 minutes)
- Chicken and Veggie Stir-Fry with rice or noodles
- Burgers
- Tacos
- Cranberry Chicken
- Pulled Pork (slow cooker - Kathi Spaeth's recipe - YUMMO!)
- Pork Tenderloin on the grill (Kathy Caslin's recipe - so good!)
- Rachel Ray's 30-Minute Shepard's Pie (Really great!)
- Steak/London Broil on the grill (Hermione's dry-rub for London Broil is to die for)
- Marie Collander's Chicken Pot Pies - SHAMEFUL!
- Gigi's stew (Sookie's Mommy's recipe - oh yum!)
- Roasted Chicken (A Sunday night staple)
Monday, January 2, 2012
New Year - New You?
Happy 2012 Peeps! I hope everyone had a "Rocking New Year's Eve"! This is the FIRST year that I can say that the ENTIRE Busy Momma Crew made it to midnight! We all were awake to see the ball drop - quite an accomplishment for this crew. And as we are about to close the curtains on the second official day of the New Year, I am actually thinking about setting some resolutions.
Now for those of you who know me well - resolutions aren't my thing. First of all - I really see New Year's Resolutions as a dangerous diving board into the deep, dark pool of failure and shame. Of course we'd all LOVE to lose 10, 30, 60 pounds and fit back into our wedding gowns. And I'm sure many of us would really like to stop watching "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" in favor of other, more highbrow and worthwhile programming - like "The Bachelor." But as my darling sis-in-law says "those Kardashians just suck you in!" And I agree - they do, they really do.. I think it's the eye makeup and fake eyelashes that mesmerize me...but I digress. We'd all love to stop reading People magazine in favor of The Economist or even Newsweek...in theory. But here's the thing - how many of us will actually do what it takes to lose the weight and break up with Kim, Khloe, Kourtney and the rest of the crew? Not many of us - not many of us at all. And that doesn't make us bad people - it makes us human.
I have a theory about why SO many people fail when it comes to New Year's resolutions. Most resolutions focus on denying ourselves - doing without. Losing weight, reigning in our spending, watching less reality tv, getting up at the butt-crack of dawn to work out...all of these resolutions, while fantastic goals, all center around deprivation and sacrifice. And one can only deprive one's self for so long. And in the current economic climate -we all have ENOUGH to worry about! We NEED our Kardashians and our People magazine fixes and the occasional tube, I mean spoon, of Tollhouse cookie dough.
That is why my goals for 2012 are a bit different. I am going to focus on "improvement" and "life enhancement" rather than deprivation and sacrifice. (At least that is what I am going to tell myself!)So, without any further ado - here are Busy Momma's Resolutions for 2012:
Now for those of you who know me well - resolutions aren't my thing. First of all - I really see New Year's Resolutions as a dangerous diving board into the deep, dark pool of failure and shame. Of course we'd all LOVE to lose 10, 30, 60 pounds and fit back into our wedding gowns. And I'm sure many of us would really like to stop watching "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" in favor of other, more highbrow and worthwhile programming - like "The Bachelor." But as my darling sis-in-law says "those Kardashians just suck you in!" And I agree - they do, they really do.. I think it's the eye makeup and fake eyelashes that mesmerize me...but I digress. We'd all love to stop reading People magazine in favor of The Economist or even Newsweek...in theory. But here's the thing - how many of us will actually do what it takes to lose the weight and break up with Kim, Khloe, Kourtney and the rest of the crew? Not many of us - not many of us at all. And that doesn't make us bad people - it makes us human.
I have a theory about why SO many people fail when it comes to New Year's resolutions. Most resolutions focus on denying ourselves - doing without. Losing weight, reigning in our spending, watching less reality tv, getting up at the butt-crack of dawn to work out...all of these resolutions, while fantastic goals, all center around deprivation and sacrifice. And one can only deprive one's self for so long. And in the current economic climate -we all have ENOUGH to worry about! We NEED our Kardashians and our People magazine fixes and the occasional tube, I mean spoon, of Tollhouse cookie dough.
That is why my goals for 2012 are a bit different. I am going to focus on "improvement" and "life enhancement" rather than deprivation and sacrifice. (At least that is what I am going to tell myself!)So, without any further ado - here are Busy Momma's Resolutions for 2012:
- Busy Momma is going to focus on taking care of her busy self. You see, while I know that I don't look a day over 25 - Busy Momma is hurtling down the road to 40-town. I know - you can't believe it, right? Damn, I look good...but again, I digress. 40 is right around the corner. 40 is actually 374 days away from today. In 374 days, I will be 40! And while I am usually not the type to fret about aging, 40 is kind of a big deal. So, I am really going to try to practice a bit of "Momma care" as I care for everyone around me. Things are amiss in Busy Momma's life when the DOGGIE visits the salon more than me! So, this year will be the year that I fit in exercise on a more regular and consistent basis, I go and have that full body scan by the dermatologist that I have been putting off, I make healthier eating choices and I cut back on the sauce. And by sauce - I mean Diet Coke. I really need to wean myself off of diet soda and drink more water and green tea. And if these changes result in a 60-pound weight loss - then great. If they result in me feeling great and more energetic - then that's even better. (Although fitting back into my wedding dress and honeymoon bikini would be really swell - who am I kidding?)
- Busy Momma is going to spend this coming year PURGING! You see, we have a terrible, dirty little secret, and I am revealing it here for the world to see. If you've been to my home recently, you will have noticed that we have redecorated our main living areas - living room/office, family room and the powder room is "in process". Things are organized and lovely. But here is the terrible truth- we live in a chaos sandwich. Yup - that's right. It's a sandwich made of a lovely main floor nestled beautifully between two layers of mess! Now, don't get me wrong - I'm not living an episode of "Hoarders" over here - another show I really could do without. We just have accumulated a lot of "stuff" - Barbies, Hot Wheels, books, craft supplies, stuffed animals - and all of it has been lovingly "tossed" into bedrooms or into the black hole that is the basement. And it's time to declutter, and focus on redoing those rooms. The kids are at an age where they really need to transition from their little kid decor and get a bit more sophisticated. (Which makes me laugh out loud right now thinking of little Jack in a smoking jacket, with a pipe between his teeth, reading the latest Junie B. Jones book!) But I can't possibly redecorate anything without doing a thorough purge first. So, I am going to create a month-by-month schedule and tackle one room per month. And I am starting with MY room. You know how Oprah and Nate Berkus always say that your bedroom should be your "haven" and your "retreat"? Well, right now, my bedroom currently houses one dog crate, one VERY OLD mattress and boxspring, my bedroom furniture that is way too matchy matchy for my tastes these days, a comforter set that has been thrown up on one too many times, an overflowing bookshelf, way too much scrapbooking stuff, and a variety of things under the bed. These things include, but are not limited to old magazines, long lost remotes, several headless, naked Barbie dolls, random Monster Trucks, some Legos and God only knows what else. The time has come. So, January is my room, February is Jack's, March will be Bella's room, and in April we will begin tacking the basement. I think the basement might take longer than a month. I will keep you all updated on that project.
- Busy Momma is taking her blog to the next level! In the 2 years that I have been blogging, I have rediscovered my love of writing. And while I don't profess to be all that great at it - many of you have been kind enough to tell me how much you've enjoyed reading certain posts and that makes me feel TERRIFIC! I LOVE reading your comments on the blog or on Facebook. So, this is the year that Busy Momma is going to expand. I have a lot of plans, including starting a Facebook page for Busy Momma, opening up advertising space on the blog, attending a "Bloggy Bootcamp" in May to help me connect with other bloggers and so much more. So be on the lookout for improvements to the blogs and good things to come. Some of you have expressed interest in buying ad space on the blog - hang tight. I'm in the process of learning how to do that. And if you know anyone - a Mom-trepreneur who is looking to expand her business - introduce them to the blog and who knows? Maybe we can help one another grow!
So that's it my Peeps - my resolutions for 2012. I'd love it if you would share YOUR resolutions with ME! I will keep you all up-to-date with my declutter project. It is sure to involve some hilarity if PC and I have to purchase any kind of furniture that needs to be assembled. Lots of love and good wishes to you guys as we enter 2012!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)